I just couldn't do it.
Is it because of my age? Maybe. Because
of my Southern good-girl background? That probably has something to
do with it. Is it because my Mama would get permission from God
Himself to come down from Heaven and give me a stern talking to? (If
anybody would do it, she would). I'm sure that figures into my decision
making.
Whatever the reason, I KNOW I could not
trash my wedding dress.
Apparently this has become the
latest thing in Wedding Photography.
Right after your wedding, or sometime
after, you and your groom run into the ocean together, or eat
Popsicles and let them drip down the dress, or have a paintball
fight. The pictures
are cute juxtaposed against the
“seriousness” of the other poses. But it doesn't seem right.
When I first read
about this on Jennifer's blog,
A Traveling Wife, I was quite taken
aback. Now, she did not trash her dress. She decided to have a dear
friend
make a pillow from her dress, and I think that is perfectly
acceptable. It holds a place of honor in her home. It provides a
daily visual reminder of her commitment to her husband and harkens
back to memories of that very special day spent with her family and
friends who now live very far away.
But splash paint on it? Burn it? Go
mud-riding in it?
I just couldn't do it. And when I read
Jennifer's post, I immediately knew this topic would be a blog post.
Here I am on my wedding day...
I brought my dress out of storage and
the memories flooded back. I took out my wedding album, too. There I am,
smiling with a joy you can feel through the lens, so proud to be in
that moment. A moment that would never come again.
In those pictures I am wearing a dress
I worked two jobs to pay for, but for me it was priceless. My Mama
is fixing my veil in one of the pictures, in another I am
straightening my brother’s tie. My oldest sister is my matron of
honor, and there in the picture of the attendants you can clearly
see the lone bridesmaid's bouquet on the alter in memory of my sister who
could not be at my side that day, because she was by God's side in
heaven. In one of the most poignant pictures, I am holding onto my
Daddy's arm...My Daddy who is now in Heaven...and he is looking down
at me like I am sure he does now, in love with his baby girl.
Wearing the prettiest dress I will ever
own, I walked down the aisle to my expectant groom while “Ode to
Joy” played softly in the background. I will never forget the way
he looked at me. As long as I live, I will never forget how I felt on
that day.
Yes, a wedding dress is just that, a
dress. A garment sewn on the same machines as common clothes. But
there is nothing common about it. It is a representation of a moment,
a day, an occasion that will never come again.
I tried my dress on, just to see. It
fit, a little more snugly now, but it zipped, (with some
encouragement!) I tried to get a good picture in it, but I thought I would spontaneously combust, so I took it off!
Next week, on May 7th, we
will have been married 18 years. I can say with certainty this:
Enough mud gets slung at your marriage to last a lifetime. Let your
dress always remind you of the moment all was fresh and bright and
new.
I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to get some
comments on this post. I know there are probably strong opinions one
way or another, and I will take all comers!
Would you ever “destroy your dress”?
Let me hear how you feel!
~joy!
Vicky